Thursday, March 8, 2012

Five Minute Friday: Empty


It's amazing to me that a woman like me could feel so full and so empty at the same time. I am so full of desire but so empty of results. I feel like I'm full of the abstract and surrounded by the echo of what wants to be tangible but isn't. Yet.

I have so many thoughts and dreams, still, at my age. You would think I would be winding down and yet, no, I am still dreaming. I don't know if I'm just a dreamer, someone who spins beautiful webs in the upper corners of my heart but doesn't know how to expose them to the world. I don't want to just dream. I want to do. I want to be. I long to fill my life up and evict the emptiness.

My life is so full. I am so busy. But the busy-ness doesn't equal full-ness. And the emptiness yawns and brings me back in.

I want to be so full of Christ that I can't help, just by my life, but to have Him pour out of me into the world and into everyone I meet, especially those I have such impact on- and those I cherish the most. 

I'm so busy. And so tired. And so full. So why do I sometimes feel so depleted? So utterly spent. Not empty, as without hope, but empty, as a cavern full of possibilities yet unrealized...



  1. I understand that feeling empty . . . so full and busy, yet being emptied. I love the picture of your table . . . we could "almost" fit around that! :)

  2. I think you just beautifully captured how most women . . . people in general? feel. You are not just a dreamer. God created you to do both. Dream and do. Just wait for Him, He will combine the two...

  3. These inner thoughts are ones I deal with daily... and the dreams not yet realized... I understand well... it seems I spend most of my days trying to get DONE with it is I have to do, so I can get to the things I want to do, relating to dreams.. but I have to remember that this life I live, I live surrendered to Him and I want to live in the present moment, and not miss the gifts I have before me, while looking out for something better... Only by grace...

    Sorry for my ramblings... Blessings to you...

  4. "...the busy-ness doesn't equal full-ness." Oh, this is so true. I tried for so long to fill my emptiness with busyness. And I can relate to still dreaming dreams. Keep dreaming, friend.

  5. Visiting from the 5 Minute Friday link up. I know of this busyness. I have children much in the same age range - 8, 11, 17 and 20. My eldest to be married in June. Yes, I am full, but often feel depleted and spent as you mentioned. I love how you see this emptiness as possibilities not yet realized. Thank you for this perspective.

  6. You guys are all so kind and encouraging. So blessed to be on this journey with so many like-minded sisters in Christ :)